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Just Jokin'!
 Welcome to our jokes page. If you would like to submit a joke, please send it to us via email at: info@baitinc.com. Let's keep 'em clean fellas! Two guys from Daniels County are quietly sittin' in a boat at Fort Peck Montana fishing and suckin' down beer when suddenly Karnes says, "I think I'm going to divorce my wife - she hasn't spoken to me in over 2 months." Earl sips his beer and says, "You better think it over - women like that are hard to find." Pappy sees Little Johnny walking with a lantern and asks, "Where ya going boy?" The Johnny smiled and replied, "I'm a-going courting Peggy-Sue." Pappy said, "When I went a-courtin', I didn't need me no dang lantern." "I know, Pa." Johnny said. "And look what you got!" A man and his friend were hunting deer in rural Missouri near a blacktop Before he could release his arrow, his friend alerted him to a funeral The hunter slowly let off the pressure on his bow, took off his hat, bowed His friend was amazed. "Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing The hunter shrugged. "Yeah, well, we were married for 35 years There was a household of hillbillies that decided to take a trip to New York City. Not ever been in a city before, they checked into a Motel and noticed there was an opening in the wall that opened and closed. While they stood there in amazement they saw an elderly woman get into this hole in the wall and she disappeared. A few moments later the door in the wall opened back up and a very beautiful woman walked out. The son looked at his father and said "what just happend pa". He replied, I don't know son, but go get your mother. The wife walked into the kitchen to find her husband roaming around with a flyswatter. She asked, killed any flys yet? He replied, yes 3 males and 2 females. She looks at him puzzled and says, how do you know the difference? He said the males were on beer cans and the females were on the phone!!!! A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly cold winter and planned to stay in the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. They were leaving out at different times, the husband arriving first, checked in to his room and decided to send his wife an e-mail. Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral, who was a pastor and had been called home to glory, decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from friends and relatives. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted. The son rushed into the room, finding his mother on the floor, reading the message: I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then!! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was. PS It sure is hot down here!! A fire fighter is working on the engine outside the station when he notices a little girl next door in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. The girl is wearing a fire fighter's helmet. The wagon is being pulled by her dog and her tom cat. The fire fighter walked over to take a closer look. "That sure is a nice fire truck." Thanks, the girl says. The fire fighter looks a little closer and notices the girl has tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the tom cat's testicles. Little Partner, the fire fighter says, I don't want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go faster. The little girl replies thoughtfully, "You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a siren." |
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